We've been going to the Church of the Broken Pew since mid January and haven't had any other property damage issues, that is until Sunday.
But first, we are really loving this church. Gasp. There, I said it again. We are over six weeks in and are all still learning, enjoying the singing, really like the pastor. It's a miracle. The only negative, bedsides the property damage, is that it is one of the BIGGEST churches I've ever been to and we don't know anyone. Okay, we know people, for some strange reason every teacher at Hannah's middle school attends there and most of my workmates go there, but it is SO big that we do not see anyone or talk to anyone. We beeline in. We beeline out. The beeline in is due to our perpetual tardiness and the fact that we are all in a hurry to get in and sing, the beeline out is that big church=big parking lot=big mess. We have it down to a system and are usually waving at all the suckers stuck in line.
Back to Sunday. Bubba (how did you know?) was sitting between David and Hannah. Since it was the first Sunday of the month we had communion. Let me stop right here and say that I've never done communion this way. What way is different? Well, when you are in the mega church they stack the communion cups. When the tray (only one) is passed you grab a cup and it is actually two cups stacked together. The bottom cup has the wafer, and the top cup the grape juice. I guess they do this conserve on time. Anyway, we all grab a cup and start our reflection when I feel a hand on me. David is reaching over both of our children to grab my arm. I open my eyes and look up thinking, how rude, to see David pantomiming the "give me a towel, kleenex or napkin" sign. I grab a pack of tissue out of my purse and hand them over, still oblivious to the sitch, thinking David had to blow his nose.
Finally I focus on Bubba and see that he is sitting cross legged on the pew with the grape juice in on hand and the wafer cup in the other. Strung out between his two hands, joining them is a million fishing line type threads of his neon green gum. He is basically sitting cross legged in a spider web of neon green gum. It is everywhere. Tissues are being dispensed, hand sanitizer sprayer on surfaces hoping to remove gum, all about as quietly as a heard of elephants during this time of reflection. It is a good thing the music started up to cover our din.