What are your 40's known for? My 40's have been the age of self discovery for the last 18 months. And what have I discovered? First, I'm a cryer. If ANYONE is crying whether on t.v., in real life, on the phone, anywhere, I cry too. Big fat crocodile tears. Uncontrollable sobbing. The one exception? My mother. My Mother is on some post-cancer drug that makes you super emotional, or so her physician says, and as soon as my Mother starts to cry? Nothing. Nada. Zip. But anyone else? For any reason? I'm dissolved into a pool of tears. And the thing is? I don't come from crybaby stock. I used to make fun of people for crying. Once, my sister-in-law and I were sitting in a movie theater and she started to cry DURING A PREVIEW OF PRANCER. I just sat there and stared, actually made fun of her later. Who would cry during a preview of Prancer for God's sake? And my brother-in-law? He is a funeral cryer. I have learned that although I usually stand by my sister during a funeral (safety in numbers and familiarity and all), I CANNOT stand next to my brother-in-law. He is a funeral cryer. And when he cries? I'm done for. I have to choose my place wisely.
Discovery #2. I do not like playing games or cards of any kind with my parents or large groups of people. It sounds incredibly calloused, but as my parents have aged, their playing skills have deteriorated and I don't have the attention span to play cards with slowpokes, hesitaters, or too many people.
Discovery #3. I don't do well with unplanned time. Our two snow days this week threw me for a loop. I measure my self worth by my accomplishments. Being at home for two days in a row without things planned I start to loose track of time. What did I do yesterday? It is like I have amnesia, I can't remember a thing I did. And did I do anything constructive? Nope. I remember being in my studio trying to plan something to sew or make, and looking at all my half started projects, but I didn't do A THING.
Discovery #4. I don't like some kids or stalkers. I know, again it sounds calloused. And weird. Let me explain. I have a Kindergartener in my class named "Carl." During last fall's soccer season I saw Carl's Mom on the sidelines one game and we sat and talked the entire game. I like her, she's fun. Carl's Mom, "Maria," and I were talking and the subject of futures arose. Maria said her husband was about to retire from the Air Force and they were deciding where to live when he retired. I was talking about my house and how much I loved it, when Maria asked the name of my neighborhood. You can see where this is going. I told her the name of our neighborhood (it is all of about 5 streets) and she said it was where they had been looking and she wanted to buy a house there. In my neighborhood. Here. Buy a house.
So months pass, and when Maria drops off Carl every school day morning she asks how the neighborhood is. If there are any houses for sale in my neighborhood. She said she drives through every day or two looking. Oi. Well a house, not even on the market, came onto her radar and she bought it. Yes. Bought it. It wasn't even listed. She hunted down the owner, invited herself into the house while the current tenants where there, and offered the owner money and...he took it. A house a stone's throw from my own.
Today, after the long two day snow break, Maria said they finalized the house, oh boy! Then, in the midst of her three boys, she was talking about how she and her three boys would be over at my house all the time and how I could help her three boys with their homework, and how her three boys would come over and play. Silence. Crickets chirping. Did I say three boys? Maybe I should put it this way...if someone had captured a baby bengal tiger a baby bear and a baby lion, put them in a bag for 3 days without food, then released them into a butcher shop, you would be describing her three boys standing, or should I say fighting, in her midst. The are a HANDFUL.
I know plenty of people with three boys, and their children are nothing like THESE three. Some parents think to themselves I have three over active children so I am going to parent them, have rules and keep these children under control, and some parents think to themselves I have three over active beasts and I am going to let them do whatever the hell they want. Maria chooses the later. I like Maria, but I don't need to like her children. I'm guessing that a frank discussion of personal space and how I like my quiet home and yard is going to come up real soon.