Friday, July 15, 2011

Dear Movie Mommy,

Dear Movie Mommy,

Thank you so much for being complete idiots.  We are not going to sugar coat it here, but why in the HELL would you bring your three children under the age of 5 to the (wonderful by the way) PG-13 Harry Potter finale?  No kidding.  THREE children under FIVE.  You, my friend, are an idiot.  As well as a horrible whisperer and an awful "shussher."

A. Hire a babysitter.  Spend the money you spent on their movie tickets and hire someone. They would rather sit on the floor and play blocks or go to the park, than sit quietly through a mature movie.
B. Those kids don't know who Harry Potter is, and are well under the age of 13.
C. You kids would have rather seen the Winnie the Pooh movie.  Take one for the team and do something for your kids.
D. I doubt you kids haven't seen the previous Harry Potter movies.
E.  Those important points of dialogue that we (your fellow movie goers) are interested in happens when YOUR kids were the loudest.  And whiniest.

Yes, my date for the movie was 10, well under the recommended age of 13, but he HAS seen all of the other Harry Potter movies AND read all of the books.  AND, by the way, he has previously won a Barnes and Noble Harry Potter costume contest.  So there.

The incident today has posed the young is too young for intense movies like Harry Potter?  Let's look back a few years to 2007.  The Pirates of the Caribbean At World's End movie was just coming (then 7 year old) had seen all the previous Pirates movies on DVD, and my extended family was together (Sam is the youngest of all his cousins) and all wanted to see the new Pirates movie.  David and I went back and forth.  Sam begged.  What to do?

David and I told Sam that he could go.  We did also mention to him that we reserved the right to take him out or cover his eyes (without protest) AND we sat on either side of him in the theater, in the middle of the cluster of our group of 16...overprotective?  Maybe.  But did we think it through?  Yes.  

I digress.  Back to the thank you note...Movie Mommy?  Besides wrecking the experience for the rest of the theater, could you PLEASE stop your mouth breathing and consider listening to the needs of your children?  You kids are babies and you should not expect them act interested in your stuff.  



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